Her Higher Vibes

If you ask a lot of women they would agree that beauty standards are one of the gravest attacks on women. It’s a social standard that has become an in home attack on women more so now in an era where we have a good view into the average persons daily home life.

There has always been a standard for women since I’ve known. As a young girl I was groomed by my home experience but mostly I was influenced by society and especially the media on how women should look, dress and act in order to achieve “good girl” roles and how you earn the “bad girl” ones.

The media showed me that by nature women who looked like me didn’t fit the “good girl” titles that the tiny titty, skinny models were apparently born with however I knew by my personal experiences that women who looked like me were fetishized in abundance by both men and women and we also intimidated them. When I say women like me I mean black, African or African American, minority, naturally curvy and “voluptuous” natural born women.

A lot of us were ostracized by people closest to us for reasons out of our control due to their unconscious or sometimes conscious uncomfortableness of our beauty and or curves. Even as girls sometimes told and even shown that our bodies were a curse that will either be the only thing of importance or that it paled In comparison to another’s beauty, smarts or other accolades. While women with pretty faces or fiscally stable families probably also felt that women that had what they lacked put them in the shade. There has been this fight on beauty standards since I’ve known and what history has shown. Whatever beauty preference it has been at the forefront of social politics because it’s a great symbolism to youth, health, success and even love.

In religious matters it is scary how some women are not allowed to show their beauty not because of personal choice but in fear of being attacked by their family and or community.

Here in the states our biggest fears are being scrutinized by our friends, families or media. Who says their fear is someone seeing us and making fun, bullying, or trying and worst succeeding in sexually assaulting us and not being held accountable because of the thought that the way a woman dresses excuses the mental illness of the assaulter. These are all good reasons for a caretaker or loved one to be concerned as this has been a reality in our society at times. Unfortunately most women know that dressed up or down these incidents can still take place.

Americas fascination yet avoidance of rape is legendary. I once had someone tell me that a successful man wouldn’t rape an ugly woman when there are more good looking women throwing themselves at them and I’m betting I could bring many victims of rape and assault that have been picked up out of the beds and assaulted in closet’s to be told they wouldn’t be believed and or if they made a fuss their families would be hurt. I digress because this story is about beauty standards and the attack on them.

There is also a dark part of our society that fears women’s health and beauty due to the buying and selling of women for their outward and internal gifts on the black market. It has become nationally known that women of color especially black women are even today sold for sex services and parts and goods.

Back to beauty. Our culture has become so obsessed with beauty that it wanted to make us look alike from man to trans woman to born woman. By way of makeup, hair extensions, bbl and breast implants, this has made the culture bear very little distinction from one another and my biggest concern is this the way it was supposed to be? Human emotions want fair but is fair our natural state? Is fairness between sexes healthy for women? Haven’t women burden enough? Why do we have to give up our god given freedom of femininity and still not receive peace? What I do know is this fight shouldn’t be & isn’t our (women) burden!

I want to leave my readers with the thought that beauty is a gift as physical and mental health are, and as mental stamina and clarity otherwise known as smarts are other gifts. None of these gifts means that we are better or worse in the eyes God as we were all made different for a reason. My belief is that we are supposed to use our individual gifts for a combined & collective success. For me I believe that it is our goal to work in unison & solidarity to achieve peace with one another while also healing from our individual traumas and tragedy’s. My hope is that we reach success in this today and everyday after. Peace ☮️ & blessings.